Till It Kills Me
By Trulah & Madison Ryann Ward
Behind the song,
Written from a place of vulnerability and honesty during time spent visiting with my sister in Christ, Madison, ‘Till It Kills Me’ seems to articulate the inner wrestlings of death to self. The call to Christ is a call to die. Jesus said in Mark 8:34-35 ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it.’
Though the call is to die, morbid as it may sound, this sort of death is not a condemnation, it is for our good. It is a death to death itself, to all that which perishes, harms and enslaves. It is a death that yields life, the reward and hope being as 2 Timothy 2:11 puts it, ‘If we have died with him [Christ], we will also live with him; if we endure, we will also reign with him.
And so, having the same resolve as Paul in Philippians 3:10-12, we die that we might live eternally with Christ ‘I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead.’ We pray this song would serve you as God heals, reveals and keeps you in Christ, by way of return and rest in Him. Lyrics below.
Lyrics
Lyrics
Till It Kills Me Lyrics & Music by Trulah & Madison Ryann Ward
Mind on the loose
Running freely
Though I could choose
It’s not that easy
All the things I leave behind
Living for another life
Guess I will love You till it kills me
Mind on the loose
Can You heal me
Always accused of what I used to be
Reaching for the things I know
Something that’ll make me whole
I’m gonna love You till it fills me
Fill me with your joy again
Give me peace that’s heaven-sent
Surpassing what I understand
Fill me till I overflow
Keep me when I wanna go
You’re my everlasting hope
Mind on the loose
Would You cleanse me
Invade every room
Renew my thinking
Troubled waters of the mind
I need You to walk beside
I’m gonna love You till it stills me
Still me to a quiet place
Be my only hideaway
I need Your embrace
I’m gonna love You through and through
I wanna love like You
So I will love You till it kills me